“Comparison is the thief of joy” is one of my favourite quotes by Theodore Roosevelt, and it couldn’t be anymore true!
I can recall many moments when I felt stuck in comparison, but the one comparison that had a hold on me for a long time was the comparison of my life to my siblings: they are all ‘successful’; have great careers; are in great relationships; have completed degrees; some have children; and they live on their own. Comparing myself to them in these areas made me feel so unhappy that I believed I could never amount to even an eighth of all they had accomplished in their lives.
This went on for a very long time until I finally I realized that I had to take responsibility for my life. When I did, I realized that most importantly I needed to take responsibility for creating the turmoil I was feeling, and thankfully I got past this area of comparison with my siblings.
I made the decision to live my life; that there was nothing wrong with the direction I took; there was nothing wrong with the career I choose; and there was nothing wrong with the relationship I was in.
I finally accepted who I am and decided not to be attached to the way “I think my life should look.” Thank God for that!! And I literally mean Thank God.
Now I admit comparison isn’t an easy thing to crack, and I continue to deal with it. However, what is different now is I am not attached to the comparison process. I see it, and acknowledge it, but am no longer emotionally wrapped in it. I am now so clear about how comparison takes away the opportunity for me to live, love, have fun and experience life in a way I think is right for me, and not how I feel others think I should live my life. I am declaring 2017 to be the year I live life by my design and I encourage you all to do the same. Let’s take this thing called life by the horns and steer it in the direction we see fit!
Written by Simone Vitellaro